Guilt

It's that time again - back to school. Ever since I had Emmett, I've experienced guilt and some dread at this time of year. This year, it's been really bad. Susie is younger than Emmett when I started back to work. I feel like I need more time. Add on top of that the fact that my great third grade partner won't be coming back, and I have no clue who I'm working with. And Susie wouldn't take a bottle. And I want to potty train Emmett but I need time to do that. My method of dealing with these feelings has been to avoid all thoughts of school and just cram as much fun into each day as we can handle.

Last night, my principal called. He started the conversation with "I'm surprised you haven't called me about the third grade situation." Oops. Honesty is the best policy, right? So I told him that I was moping and trying not to think about it. We laughed, but I really wasn't kidding. Now I have to face reality that I'm going back to work. (I need to say that Gigi is the most amazing person. I have no worries at all about leaving my kids with her. She keeps me sane!)

So I've been getting ready. I worked with a few people to get Susie to take a bottle. It was horrible and emotional, but we finally found a bottle she'd take (Thanks Cam and Gigi). I've started a pile of things to take to Gigi's house. I've started thinking about my back to school bulletin board. I've given myself a pep talk that my new partner will be great and it's going to be a great year.

Change isn't easy, and we're about to be hit with a big dose of it.